Ebay is the marketplace for some unbelievable junk sometimes. Now there’s an absolutely outrageous product that just makes your mouth practically fall off your face in shock and disbelief. Some enterprising small company is now marketing fake semen of all things, as if there’s suddenly a world crisis shortage of the real stuff. Who ever knew that body fluids were suddenly in such short supply that synthetic ones need to be created to supplement!

Gobblie Goo is a completely safe and edible formula that’s supposed to look and taste like the real thing. The stuff sells for an incredible $19.99 in a six pack and is actually half sold out at this point. The stuff actually sells so well that Gobblie Goo has their own “Gobblie Goo General Store” over at Ebay as well. Yeah, you remember having a fake semen general store in the small town you were raised in don’t you. Remember that rural TV comedy, GREEN ACRES, where Mr. Douglas would regularly visit that fake semen general store to bring home fresh fake semen, don’t you? What in heck is a fake semen general store, anyway?

So why even buy this stuff? Well, the Ebay ads claim that it can be useful in making movies, at parties, etc. At parties? What kind of parties are you having anyway?

Oh, and did I forget to mention that the product can be considered vegan as well. Oh, that’s a relief, no animal suffered to make this crap.

Well, in a twisted sort of way, this stuff might find some humorous use for some. But, call me old fashioned here, the real stuff suits most folks in the bedroom just fine, thank you.