Parenthood Season Premiere: Bad Hair and Buying Babies

NBC’s “Parenthood” returned for the season three premiere on Tuesday and, as much as I enjoyed the show, let me just start by asking this: Haddie (Sarah Ramos) and Amber (Mae Whitman), what did you do to your hair? Did they take all mirrors away from you over the summer? At least Amber’s cut semi-fits her emo-style, but the ‘80s perm Haddie is sporting is a no go. Can we get hair and makeup over to help them out?

Now that I’ve got that out of the way, it’s onto other Braverman news. Julia (Erika Christensen) and Joel (Sam Jaeger) haven’t had any luck with having or adopting a baby, but hey – there’s a pregnant coffee-cart girl at Julia’s office, so that may solve their problems. Julia worked it all out in her head and then rushed home to tell her family, “The latte girl at work is pregnant and I really want to ask her if I can buy her baby.”

Yep, she said it. Buy her baby. I found it comical, as a joke should be, but I would not want to be the intern opening all those complaint letters NBC will receive from adoption advocates in the very near future. And this won’t be the end of it – next week’s episode is titled “Hey, If You’re Not Using That Baby.”

More baby news – Kristina (Monica Potter) went from telling her husband she was pregnant in the April season finale to being seven months pregnant in this season’s opener. That means it won’t be too long until Haddie and Max (Max Burkholder) have a new sibling, so no wonder Adam (Peter Krause) is stressing about not having a job. Until he gets a callback for a soda distributing position, he spends his days on the couch watching reruns of “Charles in Charge,” which, who knew that that show was still on the air?

Max discourages Haddie from going to a big high school bash because “I know there’s alcohol at high school parties. I watch ‘Friday Night Lights.’” Clever writers – both Michael B. Jordan (who plays Haddie’s boyfriend, Alex) and Parenthood producer Jason Katims are FNL alums.

Bring on the cliché high school party scene where no one is without a red Solo cup in their hand, except those making out in the corner. When Alex, the recovering alcoholic, comes to pick up Haddie, he gets upset and ends up punching the guy who threw the party. Someone calls the cops (not sure what underage drunk guy thought that was a good idea) and Alex is arrested. Julia saves the day and bails him out of jail, only to find out this isn’t his first offense. To make matters worse, the parents of the kid who threw the party want to press charges. Wait… what? Shouldn’t the parents who had a houseful of underage kids drinking be the ones in trouble?

Until next week, I will leave you with this magnificent quote from Sarah (Lauren Graham), “I kissed him like a starving person looking for a sandwich.”

Brooke is an entertainment junkie, who you can follow on Twitter @RNYBrooke.

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