Madonna: I'm Not Gay (Wizbang Pop!)

Ever since Snoop Kevy Kev gave me this job waxing poetic on the ins and the outs of celebrity whazzits, I've watched as the pics of hotness have gone down, and all these...words...like in every post! It's enough to confuse even the most diehard celebrity fan. My friends, this story is the convergence of those two schools of thought: words AND pictures.

You see, I actually have a reason to post a picture of Madonna and Britney Spears locking lips. And, tons of words, too. Here's the words, from People:

The Material Mom tells Out magazine that her 9-year-old daughter, Lourdes, asked whether her mom is gay because she kissed another woman, the Associated Press reports.

"(Lourdes) is really obsessed with who is gay," Madonna tells Out magazine. "And she even asked, 'Mom, you know they say that you are gay?' And I'm, 'Oh, do they? Why?' And she says, 'Because you kissed Britney Spears.'"

"I said, 'No, it just means I kissed Britney Spears. I am the mommy pop star and she is the baby pop star. And I am kissing her to pass my energy on to her,'" Madonna says she told her daughter.

The round of tonsil-hockey, which took place during her performance of "Like a Virgin" at the awards show, has been used as a barometer of VMA excess ever since.

In the interview with Out, which appears in the April issue, Madonna says Lourdes often asks, "'Mom, do you want me to out who the gay men are?' And I say, 'Okay, but I think I already know.'"

Oh, Madonna, you coy minx! Not to doubt you, or anything, but nobody will believe your story about heterosexualness without a sextape. That's right, film it. Because nothing screams "I'm not gay" like having sex with a member of the opposite sex on a shaky DV Cam.

And...um...soft focus is your friend.

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Comments (9)

Madonna is living proof tha... (Below threshold)

1. Posted by Jason | March 8, 2006 3:38 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Jason:

Madonna is living proof that some people should not procreate.

Posted on March 8, 2006 15:38

9 today equals 13 when I wa... (Below threshold)

2. Posted by don surber | March 8, 2006 9:57 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

don surber:

9 today equals 13 when I was a kid

Posted on March 8, 2006 21:57

Madonna used the gay commun... (Below threshold)

3. Posted by jon | March 9, 2006 3:22 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

jon:

Madonna used the gay community to get ahead, posing as a cheap lipstick lesbian in the process. What she was really doing was appealing to male heterosexual fantasy, and trivializing same-sex sexuality in the process. Flush her.

Posted on March 9, 2006 03:22

Poor Lourdes. I would just... (Below threshold)

4. Posted by Charlotte | March 11, 2006 4:57 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Charlotte:

Poor Lourdes. I would just be mortifiedif my 50 year old mum went out in purple lycra. LYCRA! people, she is sooooo old now. so so so old. And even teens shouldnt be out and about in lycra.

Posted on March 11, 2006 04:57

I didn't know we were suppo... (Below threshold)

5. Posted by bnorm | March 13, 2006 4:48 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

bnorm:

I didn't know we were supposed to care about this... ;)

Posted on March 13, 2006 04:48

Just The same, Madonna wear... (Below threshold)

6. Posted by greg | March 28, 2006 6:58 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

greg:

Just The same, Madonna wears lycra because she can! She may be 50 now but looks as if she is 30. I will still be a fan! She certainly can capture media attention and manages to recreate herself each new album that comes along! Hooray Madonna!!! If other people even political figures may learn from this. I would tell my daughter the same thing if I were her, she did not do anything wrong in my book. She is and always will be the QUEEN of pop!

Posted on March 28, 2006 06:58

i would exept this from mad... (Below threshold)

7. Posted by Aubrey | April 10, 2006 4:36 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Aubrey:

i would exept this from madonna but not from britney common' yo britney ain't a lesbian.

Posted on April 10, 2006 16:36

Do you think that maybe Bri... (Below threshold)

8. Posted by Tanya | May 4, 2006 8:45 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Tanya:

Do you think that maybe Britney did that to get more attention, cuz no one was paying attantion or anything until she kissed... and then married a rat face.... Madonna is kool, but Britney is a hoe... :O lol.

Posted on May 4, 2006 20:45

So Charlotte, have you disc... (Below threshold)

9. Posted by Richard | May 12, 2006 10:40 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Richard:

So Charlotte, have you discovered the secret of eternal youth, and you're never going to get old? Or if you do get old, are you going to cover yourself in burlap and stay in your room forever? P.S. I was born the same year as Madonna and I could out rock you any day of the week you little twit.

Posted on May 12, 2006 10:40

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